Sitting in the airport waiting for my flight back home. As usual I have conflicted feelings. I love this place, I feel completely at home and it gives me the opportunity to see people that matter a lot to me. My bonus son – so grateful he wants to stay part of my life – his aunt and her husband and son, and mostly the … Continue reading Sweden: my complicated relationship
Not sure wether it is because it is September, or wether it is because two friends lost their dads recently but I am struggling with my past. I sleep badly, obsess about the strangest things, feel really low, can’t seem to not think about my parents – feeling bad about my dad, and the usual frustration/anger towards her. You would think I would have learned … Continue reading Struggling
A week ago I heard this song: in the blood by John Mayer but in a version of one of my favorite bands Home Free. It is amazing how these lyrics are so close to my own feelings. I’ve been listening to it non-stop. And such a beautiful version as well. It is probably not the best thing to listen to it that much, because … Continue reading Music to my struggle
And all of a sudden it is September. A very conflicting and challenging month for me. I love the season, fall but still warm, leaves are starting to change color, enjoying indian spring evenings. And on the downside, it is my birth month, the month my demons are very much alive and kicking. I struggle with them, seems even more tham ever. I’m getting desperate … Continue reading September
I have mixed feelings about this holiday. The country, the people, even a friend who showed his not so good side. Continue reading QotD
I’m happy depression is getting more out in the open, and people are more aware of it, but I still find it difficult to talk about it. Not only because of the reason behind it is still difficult to say out loud, but also because most people either treat you as if you are damaged (okay, I am, but no reason to treat me differently) … Continue reading Snap out of it?