September

And all of a sudden it is September. A very conflicting and challenging month for me.

I love the season, fall but still warm, leaves are starting to change color, enjoying indian spring evenings.

And on the downside, it is my birth month, the month my demons are very much alive and kicking. I struggle with them, seems even more tham ever. I’m getting desperate that it will never get better. I try to not be around for my birthday (NY, here I come) but I cant really dissapear for the entire month, can I?

I try to keep busy with work, and other projects, but mostly the tought of getting out of bed is already too much too handle. During the week I have to, as I do need the income of my job, but the weekends are just black holes of doing nothing and being miserable. This weekend is fully planned with stuff, but that does not mean anything will happen 😦

 

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